How to Love Yourself This Valentine’s Day

You are an actual QUEEN, and I need you to understand that.

Whether you are committed or single, the most important relationship in your life is with yourself. You can’t love someone else if you do not first love you, yenno. I know some of you are single mothers. Some of you are hard-working career women. A few of you are full-time bloggers. Some are taking care of parents, some are upholding a spouse and multiple children. A lot of you are none of those things, but we all have one thing in common – we’re just trying to make it through this thing called life unscathed. Allow me to hold your hand through Valentine’s Day (and honestly, the rest of your days) because practicing self-care well and often is essential.

T A K E A B A T H .

Taking a bath is as simple as it sounds. Live in a tiny apartment or with dingy roommates and wouldn’t dare lay your beautiful skin against a mangy bathtub? Try a bath house! (One of my favorites in NYC is Aire Ancient Baths). No matter where you do it, try to immerse yourself in some water and enjoy some peace and quiet. If you’re home just close the door, turn off the lights, burn some candles and just be. If you’re out, find yourself a nice quiet spot. Either way, spend some time alone with your thoughts immersed in some warm agua. Water is therapeutic in many ways, and if you close your eyes and imagine enough, the bathwater will sound like the ocean splashing. Instant vacation.

P O S I T I V E  A F F I R M A T I O N S .

I recently sat on a panel for Build and Brunch and we spoke about the power of positive affirmations. What does this mean specifically? It means speaking to yourself. I know, sounds a little crazy but it works. Once every few weeks, after I come out of the shower, I just stand in the mirror and really look at myself. And then I thank parts of my body for doing their job. I thank my eyes for allowing me to see the world. I thank my legs for getting back to and ‘fro. I thank my belly for functioning and properly nourishing and powering my body. Before I walk into important meetings at work, I go into the bathroom and talk to myself in the mirror. “You got this!”, “You are smart and knowledgeable!”, and “This is all you, boo!” go a long way.

N O  M O R E  P H O N E .

I know it almost feels impossible, but sometimes you need to just put your phone away. As I writing this, I am actually scrolling through Instagram. But…why? Love, your brain needs a break. Disconnect from the images being forced onto you, the incessant emails and text messages (that are usually pointless) and just enjoy the moment. If that means spending time with your children, laughing with your spouse, or catching up on that book that’s collecting dust under your laptop…do it. Your strained eyes and overstimulated brain will be relieved, if only temporarily.

G E T  S O M E  S L E E P .

I am so guilty of this. I barely sleep, and it’s not for lack of trying. I will tell myself that I will be in bed by 10, but then something happens. I forgot to send an email, I start scrolling through Instagram (again! grr), I start planning a trip…and then it’s 1 AM. I’m not sure who’s responsible for the glorification of “sleep is for the weak”, but they are dead wrong (or likely just dead because they weren’t getting any sleep)! Your body needs to recharge for the next day, cells need to regenerate. There’s a science to this. The doctor recommends a full eight hours, but six works best for me. Either way, make sure you’re getting some snooze time in. It boosts productivity, your alertness will skyrocket! It also greatly affects your mood.

L A U G H  A  L I T T L E .

Nothing will change your outlook like a good laugh. Watch a funny movie on Netflix. Go and do something you’ve always wanted to do. Call that friend that always knows just what to say. I guarantee 99.8% you will smile, and nothing is more precious than that. Not only does it work in the present, but you’ll have a wonderful moment to refer back to whenever you’re feeling down 😉

What are you doing to love yourself just a little bit more everyday? Any tips or tricks I missed?

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